Sledgehammer and Whore (via DF)
COP: You need to go to your office and see if anything’s been taken. See if a crime has been committed. Then call us and we’ll come out there.
ME: People are fucking in my office. In the middle of the night. For money. Without my permission. Certainly there’s a crime there. And it’s a brand new Ikea leather couch. I would say the couch’s innocence has been taken if nothing else.
COP: You need to go up there and see.
ME: I’m scared.
COP: It’s Larchmont, sir. It’s safe.
ME: I’m gonna beg to differ.
Cracking me up: “it’s Larchmont, sir” might be my new verbal eye roll.
